Hesitate.

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I’ve recently learned the art of hesitation.

I’ve been trying to really think, and give myself time, before making decisions.

The decisions aren’t huge, life changing ones. Their outcomes did have a huge impact on me though. And on my wellbeing.

I think that, if we can, taking a real pause to think, to let emotions quell; it’s really worthwhile.

So, as the world scrambles to get ‘back to normal’, take it easy. Go at your own pace.

Hinder.

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I’m reflecting on things that the pandemic has stopped me from doing…as well as the things I have started to do.

I have had the space to do more for my community than I have ever had before. Things I have always wanted to do – the excuses stopped. I did them.

I recall one person, when I said I wanted to do more for charity, said that ‘charity begins at home’. What they meant was, they wanted me to do more for them.

Another, when I said I wanted to help a particular local charity, tried to discourage me by saying that they already get ‘enough money’.

I finally stopped caring what they think.

I started to care about others.

It’s great! As Ghandi said ‘The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others’.

Love to you all.

Boundaries

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Boundaries. It’s a word that I’ve recently seen popping up more and more often.

I guess, in the last year, the personal boundaries we had were swept away.

I’m trying to wrestle with setting boundaries with people. I don’t want to upset anyone – I just need space.

How would I feel if someone tried to set boundaries with me? Upset and confused.

I don’t want to make others feel that way.

It’s tough, isn’t it?

Stress.

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Well, it’s not helpful, it it?

I mean, stress does have a function. It gets me, all of us, up in the morning! Thank goodness for that.

I’ve had a really stressful weekend for no good reason whatsoever. Nothing went wrong. I just suddenly felt a bit overwhelmed.

I guess, lockdown wise, we’ve all be waiting for such a long time for life to get back to ‘normal’. Now things are happening (schools are set to open again in the UK from tomorrow), am I ready? It all feels a bit ‘real’. A bit too soon.

Maybe I realised that some things about this horrendous pandemic have actually made me see things differently; changed my outlook on certain parts of life. My life.

Am I ready? Are we ready?

Let’s go!

Is it just me..?

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I am addicted to checking on a few people – who I don’t know – on social media. Each day.

I mean, a couple I have met briefly before. Another couple, nope. Never.

I know I’m not in love with them, I don’t even fancy them.

I don’t engage them in conversation, or attempt to.

I just have a weird feeling that I want to make sure they are ok.

They all share quite a lot on social media – I guess that feeds into my feelings of ‘knowing’ them.

I hope I’m not too creepy admitting this!

Hello…oh oh, oh oh.

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Long time no see!

How are you?

I hope that you are really well.

Sadly, the WordPress munchkins locked me out of the site for the last few months…it was always a bit puzzling. Now, I am back!

Since I last wrote, I’ve had a graduation, I’ve got a new job (promotion, in a pandemic?) and I have taken on some voluntary roles that have been made much easier by the fact that I can share my knowledge and time online, rather than in person.

I’m still a nurse, which to me, is the main thing.

To be a nurse in the last year has been one heck of a rollercoaster.

I hope that we have some smooth times ahead.

If you read this, and fancy sharing with a stranger on the internet, let me know how you are and what your plans are as we, hopefully, move forward from the most testing times we have collectively lived through.

Love to all x

Coming or Going?

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I’m finding it hard to make decisions. Or rather, stick to decisions I have made.

I woke up in the night with palpitations. That hasn’t happened before. It feels like a warning. But what for?

I guess that, like for all of us, life has changed so much. We are still in the midst of uncertainty.

I often think of the people who didn’t survive this pandemic; including my brothers and sisters who work in healthcare. No one should ever die while working to help others to survive.

I must be grateful for all that I have. I need to be better at gratitude.

Take care, everybody.

How are you?

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In case anyone hasn’t asked you today. How are you?

I hope that you are alright.

Life can be weird. This year, exceptionally so.

So, even if no one has asked you how you are today, people do care. Even people you haven’t met yet.

Though life can feel lonely, distressing, wrong…we are all one.

Love to you all. Yes. Even you!